Am I Able to Modify My Custody Agreement Without Approval from Court?

In a divorce involving children, it can often take a lot of time, effort, and emotional energy to reach a point where both parents agree on a transparent and equitable custody arrangement. Because of all the work involved, parents are often hesitant to shake things up regarding the custody agreement, even if there is the possibility of a better situation.

Because of that, parents sometimes want to modify or adjust the current custody agreement. However, they also want to avoid investing time and money involving the court in the change. The real question is: are there legal reasons that you should or should not (or legally cannot) make those changes without the court’s approval?

What Are Valid Reasons for Modifying a Custody Agreement?

Before you decide whether or not to make the change without the assistance and approval of the court, it’s important to note that there are only a handful of reasons that the court considers viable for a custody modification. Remember that a great deal of time, money, and legal expertise went into creating the original agreement. All parties agreed to it, and the court believes it to be in the child’s best interests. Therefore, it takes particular importance to necessitate changing the custody agreement.

For example, this is a short list of reasons the court considers valid when considering if a custody agreement should be modified:

Change in Child’s Preference

The court operates based on choosing what is best for the child in these situations. Because of that, the child’s opinions and safety are considered as strongly as the parents, and often more strongly. While a child’s feelings might be temporary or fleeting, that is not always the case, and they may have a reason to want to live primarily or more frequently with a different parent. The court would consider that a valid potential reason for the modification.

Change in Child’s Needs

While initial custody agreements focus on a child’s needs, they do not always remain the same. Everything from health issues to changes in school location can affect where a child needs to live for the best experience, and the court strongly considers this in a potential custody modification.

Change in Parental Lifestyle or Living Arrangement

It’s not just a child’s life that can impact their well-being. Their parents’ situations affect them just as much, if not more. If a parent moves a considerable distance from their previous home, this uproots the child and makes adjustment difficult. Likewise, a parent’s lifestyle change, such as a new love interest, loss of job, or other significant change to a parent’s schedule, finances, or attitude, can impact their well-being. These would be valid reasons to modify a custody agreement.

Safety Concerns and Non-Compliance

These are serious issues that would absolutely be reasons for modification. If the child’s safety is at risk for any reason or if one of the parents is not abiding by the already agreed-upon custody agreement, those are valid and immediate issues to be addressed.

While there are other reasons, such as holiday and vacation changes or convenience changes, that both parents agree upon, the ones listed above are the primary ones that the court recognizes as generally valid in most cases.

Can I Get in Trouble for Modifying a Custody Agreement without Court Approval?

The truth is, it could be much worse than just getting in trouble. You could be accused of kidnapping. That may sound extreme, but it is true. If you decide to agree with your ex to do something different than what is listed in the custody agreement, that is only decided upon between you and your ex. The court has no awareness or evidence that this has taken place.

What happens if your ex gets upset at some time and calls the authorities when you have your child at a time you and your ex agreed upon, but that falls outside the time that the court recognizes as your time? It could create a legally troubling situation very quickly.

What Are the Steps to Legal Modify a Custody Agreement in California?

Including the court in modifications to your custody agreement is always best. While it may seem inconvenient to follow this process, it is best and safest to do so that you have the court’s awareness and support in your decision-making.

As a refresher, the process to make a custody agreement modification is as follows:

  • Speak with a trusted attorney who can instruct you on the details of the process and ensure that all documentation and steps are completed properly.
  • Complete two forms: the Request for Order and the Child Custody and Visitation. Your attorney can share the numerical designation for these forms with you.
  • Make multiple copies of the form for yourself and the other parent.
  • File the forms with the court.
  • Attend mediation sessions if the court requires it or if there is resistance from the other parent.
  • Appear before a judge (only if a resolution cannot be reached through mediation).

How Can an Attorney Help Me with a Custody Agreement Modification?

While it is always wisest to involve the court in any decision related to modifying your custody agreement, the good news is that it doesn’t have to be an overly complicated process that drags all the parties back into court.

However, even the more straightforward solutions, like mediation, still require the involvement of experienced professionals. That’s why having a trusted relationship with an attorney is valuable to securing your child’s best interests.

Calling The Law Office of Patrick O’Kennedy provides you with the experience, knowledge, and passion needed to support you and your child in achieving the optimum environment and situation for their best life. We’re proud to be partners with many parents who are giving their children better tomorrows. Give us a call at 714-701-6356 so we can help you plan that tomorrow today.